Obama Is The Reincarnation Of Gilles de Rais. Hopefully Will.I.Am Isn’t Too Old For Him

06Feb08

Ok, I am kidding, he isn’t that bad, but will.i.am definitely is. The “We Are The World” shit was stupid, but at least the participants intended to do something right, even though we all know that singing about how fucked up the world is is never going to make things any goddamn better (I am talking to you Bono). Now we have will.i.am making an “emotionally charged” music video about a speech by Obama (that is literally just empty rhetoric. What is it that we can do?), glorifying a guy who thinks that black people are 90% of the way on the road to equality (implying, clearly, that electing him will be the extra 10% needed to wipe out racism completely–a farcical statement rivaled only by the things Bush says) even though “No indexes show blacks 90% of the way towards equality in any area of life. We’ve never made 65% more in income than white people. Black median household wealth is one-tenth white median household wealth. And on and on and on and on. In fact, we can’t find 90% figures relevant, outside of NBA teams and prison.” (Glen Ford, DNow!)

will.i.am… wait, fuck this, I am not going to give William the satisfaction of being called by his god awful stage name. It isn’t clever to put periods in your name and make it into a sentence that only fucking Yoda thinks is grammatically correct. We can all play Boggle motherfucker. Sadly, this lack of creativity abounds with William, who couldn’t write a lyric to save his life. You know something is wrong when you start saying shit like “Watcha gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside your trunk?” and “mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky milky cocoa” and “what are you going to do with your big buttocks, your big buttocks?” What the fuck does anyone do with a big ass? They shake it like this (ewww, I was not ready for that); or, they shit out of it. But that is about it. What do you want her to do with it Will? Is Fergie having problems with her ass? The lyrics sound as if Will is asking Fergie what she is going to do about some nasty fucking disease she has in or on her ass. Then he asks someone (I hope to god it isn’t Fergie, because the mental image is just fucking disgusting) to mix their milk with his cocoa puffs. Now what the fuck kind of fetishes are you into Will? It sounds like you want the woman to lactate on your balls. That is vile.

I digress, back to the video. Why don’t these people fucking think about who they are promoting before they start making a music video praising him? I cannot believe that anyone would think that someone who actually has a chance to be President could ever be anything but a swindler. For fuck’s sake, they barred Kucinich from debating because he strayed a little too far to the left (Read: he actually has a fucking moral compass). 1st Amendment anyone? I guess not. On top of the ludicrous 90% shit, Obama also wants to increase troop size by 100 000. 100 000!? If you don’t believe me, here is the direct quote: “That’s why I strongly support the expansion of our ground forces by adding 65,000 soldiers to the Army and 27,000 Marines” (Barack Obama, Speech to Chicago Council on Global Affairs). Then he campaigns as a fucking peace candidate! Not to mention the fact that Obama has lauded Ronald Reagan’s reforms (which, by the way, was the beginning of our current recession), which is just fucking crazy. Reagan was an actor, and then he became a puppet and one of the worst presidents the US has ever seen (besides maybe Bush II and Nixon). So, please Will, get your head out of your ass, douche bag.

By the way, the song is also terrible, and the music video kind of looks like something that Stalin would have had his cronies make for his murdering, narcissistic ass.

PS I am allowed to comment on this because will.i.am is a musician, but don’t expect many more rants like this in the future.

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